Kwotes - It blows goats!
Dr. Testicle: next time I see you I'm going to kick your fucking ass
bdizzle: awesome
Dr. Testicle: are you scared bitch
Dr. Testicle: I'm going to get my hands replaced with bear paws so I can claw the shit out of you
bdizzle: i'm down to fight you
Dr. Testicle: with the bear paws?
bdizzle: but i don't think you'd like it very much
bdizzle: yeah
Dr. Testicle: and I'm going to replace my dick with a poisonous snake
Dr. Testicle: in case I get locked up in a grapple
bdizzle: lol
Racist 0: if a young nigger wanted to sync one directory to another, recursively, excluding all instances of files named 'web.config' what command would you recommend that nigger use?
Racist 1: killall self
Racist 0: killall niggers
Phisher: Guten Tag, ich Mitarbeiter XYZ von der ABC-Bank.
Kunde: Ich kaufe nichts
Phisher: Ich will nichts verkaufen, ich will Ihnen helfen. Dazu
brauche ich Ihren Kundennamen und Ihr Kennwort.
Kunde: Ach so, meiner Username ist GeilerSack87 und mein Kennwort:
***********
Phisher: *********** kann nicht Ihr Kennwort sein
Kunde: Doch, immer wenn ich mich unterwegs anmelde und mache eine
Eingabe, erscheint am Bildschrim ***********
Phisher: Ja, was für Tasten drücken Sie denn, damit ***********
erscheint
Kunde: Es ist egal, was ich drücke, es erscheint immer *********** am
Bildschirm, dass Eingabefeld scheint kaputt zu sein. Können Sie das
Reparieren, dann kann ich ablesen, was ich eingegeben habe?
Phisher: Nein, der Defekt des Feldes ist leider nur sehr kompliziert
zu beheben. Beschreiben Sie mir doch bitte, welche Tasten Sie in
welcher Reihenfolge eingeben?
Kunde: Ich drücke die erste Taste, dann erscheint ein *, wenn ich die
zweite Taste drücke, erscheint wieder ein * usw
Phisher: Nein, Sie verstehen mich falsch, was ist auf den Tasten
aufgedruckt, die Sie drücken?
Kunde: Keine Ahnung, meine Tastatur ist so alt, das der Aufdruck
nicht mehr zu lesen ist. Aber es ist auch egal, es kommt ja doch
immer nur ein * an.
Phisher: Können Sie die Tastatur wechseln?
Kunde: Nein, aber ich kann die Seite mit meinen Notebook laden
Phisher: Tun Sie das Bitte
Kunde: Auch hier geht das Feld nicht, es erscheinen wieder nur
***********
Phisher: Ja, was haben Sie jetzt eingegeben?
Kunde: Meinen Nutzernamen und dann sind direkt die ***********
automatisch erschienen. Ich musste nichts weiter eingeben
Phisher: Arhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Wir sehen, das Leben als Phisher kann auch anstrengend sein ;)
mtaurick: there was a baby crying in my building this morning that woke me up & wouldn't stop
jwormy: should have went and ate it
wyfam: y0
wyfam: would you fuck a man in the ass every day for a week for a million dollars?
wormzzz: i don't think i could do it
wyfam: hahahaha
wyfam: man
wyfam: the horrible concept of waking up and realizing that you've got to fuck a guy in the ass - AGAIN
wormzzz: yeha
wyfam: omfg, it'd only get worse... i don't think you'd EVER get used to it... every day it would be worse and worse
wyfam: and what's worse is if you dont fuck him in the ass again - you've just ass fucked him X number of times before and for NOTHING
wormzzz: yeah
wormzzz: doesn't sound like a very good deal to me
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/ '/ ( . )( . ) \ `\
<_ ' `--`___'`___'--' ` _>
/ ' @ @/ =\@ @ ` \
/ / @@( , )@@ \ \
/ / @@| o o|@@ \ \
' / @@@@@@@@ \ `
bdizzle: david (my brother) worked with an old fucker
bdizzle: like, helping him out
bdizzle: blind + old as fuck
bdizzle: anyway
wurm: lol
bdizzle: he told me that he'd have to help him get onto the toilet
wurm: oh no
bdizzle: like take his pants off and set him down and shit
wurm: yes
wurm: i think i've heard one of these stories before
wurm: balls in the water?
bdizzle: well, there's many-a-story about this particular dude
bdizzle: but yeah
bdizzle: his balls hung all the way itno the water
wurm: man apparently when you get old yer balls hang low..
bdizzle: and he would shit on the regularly
wurm: and wobble tooo and fro...
wurm: potentially you could tie them in a knot
bdizzle: my balls nearly touch the water now
wurm: well yer gonna be that guy
bdizzle: i think i need to start worying about flushing them when i get older
wurm: yup
wurm: one of my chick friends is a nurse and she said she used to have to help this guy that would sit on the toilet and his balls would plop
bdizzle: yeah, that would kinda be refreshing in the morning though
wurm: maybe they'll come out with a 'ball rejuvination' surgery
bdizzle: would sorta give you the wake up you needed for the day
bdizzle: but having to wash shit off your balls all the time would suck.
wurm: umm yes
Fecious187: With your knowledge of computers and my people skills, we can get Pink floyd back together
Ben: so my lil brother.. everytime i catch him doing something wrong i always threaten to tell my mom.. cause he gets so scared.. it's just my fucked up older brother way of fucking with him
fecious187: yes...
Ben: anyway the other day i was in his room and i found this giant bubbler in his drawer
Ben: nice one too
Ben: i didn't know he blazed, but now i do
fecious187: no fucking way
fecious187: hahahahaha
fecious187: no way
fecious187: wowzers
fecious187: do you think your mom knows about said?
Ben: anyway his status message on aim is : 'b0mb-bombombomb' ..
Ben: nah and i won't tell her i don't want her to stress
Ben: but his status message on aim is : 'b0mb-bombombomb' ..
fecious187: yea
fecious187: hahahahahahaha
fecious187: so he's got the bomb huh?
Ben: i just wrote:
Ben: Ben: hahah 'b0mb-bombombomb' ..
Ben: Ben: i'm telling 'm0m-momomomom'
fecious187: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
fecious187: hahahahahahahahahahahaha
Ben: hahahahahaah hella
fecious187: fucking perfect
fecious187: hahahahahahahahahahahah
Ben: it's great fucking with him
fecious187: thats awesome.
fecious187: fuck
fecious187: How old is he?
Ben: like 16
fecious187: hahaha
fecious187: awesome
briandilleyownzu: one of these days one of these startups are going to make me rich as fuck
Nate D: Idea: place a filter on your ass so when you fart it smells like vanilla or whatever you like and instead of the fart noise it plays a ringtone.
briandilleypwnzu: brian
briandilleyownzu: lol, what
briandilleypwnzu: this is brian
briandilleyownzu: brian who
briandilleypwnzu: brian dilley
briandilleyownzu: awesome
briandilleyownzu: i'm brian dilley too
briandilleypwnzu: I will destroy your credibility (not that you have any)
briandilleyownzu: oh?
briandilleyownzu: how do you plan on doing that.
briandilleypwnzu: by assuming your identity
briandilleyownzu: what identity?
ReaI Deprez: Real
redemade: wtf
ReaI Deprez: How can i help you?
redemade: what are you doing
ReaI Deprez: I am going to destroy your credibility (not that you have any)
redemade: what do you mean
ReaI Deprez: I am going to destroy your credibility.
redemade: how did you know, fucker
redemade: did it send my name?
ReaI Deprez: nah, you just suck balls
redemade: stupid fucking adium
ReaI Deprez: briandilleypwnzu: I will destroy your credibility (not that you have any)
ReaI Deprez: that gave it away ---^
redemade: shit
ReaI Deprez: seriously, that's all that i had to go by
<xpiromx> True story, I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married.
<xpiromx> My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream!
<xpiromx> There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister.
<xpiromx> My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear.
<xpiromx> It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else.
<xpiromx> One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived.
<xpiromx> She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome.
<xpiromx> She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister.
<xpiromx> I was in total shock and couldn't say a word.
<xpiromx> She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me."
<xpiromx> I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me.
<xpiromx> I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door.
<xpiromx> I opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight towards my car.
<xpiromx> My future father-in-law was standing outside.
<xpiromx> With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test.
<xpiromx> We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family.
<xpiromx> The moral of this story is: "Always keep your condoms in your car"
ballzownzu:
Take it bitch harder in the asshole
fucking scream you little bitch while i rape your asshole
cumming deep inside of your anus now
you're bleeding
pushing the blood back inside of your anus
if you scream again i'll punch you in the face
ballzownzu: anal rape log ---^
ballzownzu: that was possibly the most perverse thing i've ever IMed someone before
ctanner: public static List<MudData> Select(int? intRecruitingOrgID, string strFIPS, string strZipCode, string strRSId, string strRSSId, string strStateCode, string strCountyCode, string Go)
{
if (Go != "No")
{
return
MudDataDAS.Select(intRecruitingOrgID.GetValueOrDefault(-1), strFIPS, strZipCode, strRSId, strRSSId,
strStateCode, strCountyCode);
}
else
return new List<MudData>();
}
cfeduke: seriously
cfeduke: now look here
cfeduke: that code is so bad
cfeduke: whoever wrote it
cfeduke: you must kill
cfeduke: basically drag them out of their cubicle and put them the fuck out of your misery
cfeduke: tell them "string Go for you is YES" right before you shoot them in the head
